Freelancing whanabe

I was just reading a post by Tobias Buckell, a fellow Ohioan, about his decision to work freelance and how the three years since have gone.  You can see it here http://www.tobiasbuckell.com/2009/05/09/a-three-year-freelanceiversary/.  He says some stuff that I believe is so important to anyone making the leap to freelance.  First and foremost is that working for yourself is hard work.  Long, hard work for a boss that is rarely satisfied.  

As a freelancer you are always trying to improve your work, your business contacts and your salary.  My wonderful husband has been a freelancer for seven years now and I have seen the ups and downs, the lack of sleep and free time when deadlines approach and the sweaty palms when there is little future work lined up.  But I have also seen the joy of working hard to do a job that you love.  Barry has said that he has no real hobbies because he is doing what he has grown up doing for fun - drawing.  

Now I am trying to throw my hat into the ring with writing and my Etsy store.  It's funny to me when I get frustrated over how much work it is.  Granted, I have two kids, one that is not old enough for school yet and summer break is here in three weeks anyway.  But there I am, glaring at the clock at 11pm wanting to sleep and get more work done at the same time.  Then in the afternoon, wanting to rest during my daughter's nap time and write at the same time.  There is never enough time and I am never satisfied with my work.  I want to do better work, faster and get paid more for it.  Hmm, sounds familiar.  Guess I am a freelancer after all.

Learning the ropes

I feel like I have been learning the ropes for several things all at the same time.  Writing, sewing, running an Etsy store, how to function enough to work after the kids go to bed and still get up in the morning.  It's all very overwhelming at times.  But here are some of the things that I have learned or am working on learning.

1. Coffee is my bestest friend, followed closely by beer.

2. PBS time in the morning is educational and beneficial for a four year old.  Sid the Science Kid taught my daughter about levers, pulleys and digestion, why should I be alarmed if she expects TV?  The American Academy of Pediatrics my think me wrong, but I say that an hour or two every morning is a good thing.

3. Writing is very time consuming.  There is a contest with American Romance Writers that I want to enter on June 1, getting my submission done in time is a bit of a crunch.  But that leads to lesson 4....

4. Learn how to get into your writing groove when time allows rather than dropping everything to write just because the muse has struck.  This is invaluable.  It might not work every time but I am beginning to get a lot more work done than I used to.

5. Sewing and crafting, on the other hand, is best done when the inspiration is upon you - that's when the best stuff happens.

6. The kids don't care about your deadlines.  Give them all of the undivided attention that you can when you spend time with them so that they will feel less upset and needy when you tell them to go play because it's work time for the next hour.  Fulfill their needs and they are more willing to help you fulfill yours.

7. Spouses work the same way as kids.  Just apply rule #6 all the way around.

I'll add more later as they come to me.  For now, my work hour is up and the rest of the world calls...

It's gonna be the future soon...

I dream about the future a lot. Not the distant future of flying cars and Giant Carrot Overlords, but things like my goals in life actually happening and how cool it will be. Maybe it's why I can't stay focused on one goal for too long. Give me enough time and I have already lived out the entirety of that particular journey in my head. I've already been a famous author, head vet tech at a college hospital, traveled quite a bit of the globe, been discovered as a late blooming artist/actress (what?)/model(say what?) and I've been so successful with my Etsy store that I have worked in the Etsy labs in New York and contributed numerous tutorials. Yes, my imaginary lives have been extremely successful.

In real life things are slightly less dramatic. I am happy and life is very full and I do think that I have done more than many my age. But there is not really an Oscar on my mantle and I am not a keynote speaker at conferences and I have not seen Italy. (Damn.) But it's a great life and I love it. Someday I will go to Italy and someday I will write a book. Maybe sell it. We'll have to see.

My big lesson that I have had to learn as I have gotten older and life has begun to pass by is to live outside of my head more than in it. I have seen the tragic results when people don't figure this out and I do not want to be that person. If you're wondering why no one understands how awesome you are it's probably because, in real life, you're not. Being a legend in your own mind is a lonely and bitter thing because you share it with no one.

So I want to be a legend in my family. The mom that is loved an admired by her kids as being loving, confident and willing to work hard at doing what she loves. Even if she loves more than one thing. Same with my husband, but according to him he already sees me that way. It makes me feel loved and confident and like I want to work hard to do what I love so that I am happy and can share the warm fuzzies.

See, it's all a cycle when you live outside of your head. You can't reciprocate love and happiness with yourself. But add in people and it all comes together. Until the Giant Carrots invade. Then it's every man for himself.